If there’s one thing Facebook is known for, it’s breaking up happy marriages and inventing the Super Poke. If there’s one thing New Mexico is known for, it’s alien encounters and their invention of the Super Probe.
Avoid cyber pokes, broken homes, and alien abduction by diving headfirst into The Dirty Dash – the state’s, nation’s, and…heck, probably the galaxy’s muddiest race.
Mud, much like a well-groomed beard, shields your face from harsh UV rays, the gaze of unwanted admirers, and effectively conceals years of untreated acne. Applied to the whole body, it can conceal you from extraterrestrials and put a sloppy smile all over your unwashed face.
So make some friends, knock down some enemies, save your marriage, and propel yourself through miles of intergalactic filth at The Dirty Dash New Mexico. You’ll sweep past obstacles at every turn, and in the end, you might just overcome the greatest obstacle of all, heart disease*.
*These statements have not been verified by the FDA
Race Information
Where is race held?
Still locking down the location but we’ll have it up ASAP.
How long is the course?
About 3.5 miles
What obstacles will I be facing?
We break up the monotony of running for you with some doozies: walls to climb over or crawl under, mud hills to climb, pipes to crawl through, pipes to crawl over and under, giant slip ‘n slides to launch yourself down, cargo nets to maneuver, Hometown obstacles specific to your stomping ground, beers to chug, root beers to chug, balance beams, mud pits to dive into…..and much, much more.
What charities will this race benefit?
Besides benefitting your cardiovascular system, each Dirty Dash benefits local charities through registration fees, online donations, water balloon sales, and shoe donations.
The Missoula race does not yet have an official charity so if you are affiliated with a charity that would like to be involved, please contact us HERE and we’ll get in touch with you soon.
Do we have to pay for parking?
C’mon. You think we’re going to nickel and dime you? Parking is FREE! This recession is like a bad rash that no Walgreen’s cream can solve, so how ‘bout you use that money on something more important like some tasty grub or a Dirty Dash hoodie? HOWEVER, we do encourage you to carpool since parking is limited and we care about the environment.
What’s the deal with the Piglet Plunge?
The Piglet Plunge will be the highlight of your child's summer, their storied running careers and potentially their existence to this point. They must be over age 2 and under age 12 to run in the kids' race and you’ve got to accompany them the whole way.
Registration is a measly $5.
The Piglet Plunge will be about 1 mile and will include some of the best obstacles to ensure a thoroughly muddy child: the Slop n' Slide, the Hog Wash and the Pig Sty. All children must be respectful of other children, pushing or splashing will result in being removed from the kids' race area for the day and subject to grounding at their parents’ discretion.
You’ll need to sign a waiver for them before they receive a sweet Dirty Dash Tattoo (temporary of course) to show that they can participate on race day. The Piglet Plunge will begin at 2:20 pm (80 minutes after the final adult wave starts). Register HERE.
I hear there’s beer involved?
You heard right. For those over 21 interested in making the trail a bit harder to follow, we’ve got the Beer Chug Obstacle (or root beer for those who don’t want to drink or who are under 21—either way, the foam goes straight to your brain).
HOWEVER, in order to get a beer when you get to the obstacle, you ABSOLUTELY MUST get a wristband at the event before your wave starts by showing your ID. No ID = No Wristband = No Beer.
Race Day Info
You may not be aware of this, but you’ve angered the Mud Gods. They’ve been watching you for weeks. Emerging from the shower every morning reeking of Irish Spring. Delicately cleaning the dirt from underneath your perfectly manicured fingernails. Flossing daily. Flossing!?!
They’ll have their revenge and will serve it up piping hot, super sloppy, and disgustingly dirty to you and the thousands of others who have rubbed your cleanliness in their faces for too long! The Dirty Dash is coming to you in full-frontal filthiness.
If you thought you’d signed up for this filth-fest for a self-interested good time, you’d be wrong. You’re also helping people. The Dirty Dash benefits several local charities, so soil yourself by patting yourself on the back with that big muddy paw of yours.
To prep yourself for the upcoming mudslinging, check out this important info below and
“LIKE” us on Facebook to get more frequent updates.
CAN MY FRIENDS / FAMILY COME AND WATCH?
We’ll take that action and raise you a few massive mud covered poker chips. Not only can they come and watch for FREE, but they can buy water balloons at our Hog Wash obstacle and give you the pummeling you’ve been begging for since grade school. And you’ve got to thank them for it because ALL the proceeds go right back to the charity in charge.
There’ll also be some great grub, some sweet swag from our sponsors, and some epic double twisting pike tuck dives into the mud pit that you won't want to miss!
IS THIS RACE A PARTY OR SHOULD I RUN HOME AFTERWARDS TO PREP THE KIDS FOR SCHOOL ON MONDAY?
This whole race is a party and it’s officially the dirtiest viewing entertainment available where you can watch with mouth agape for hours and still feel comfortable sitting through church on Sunday. We’ll have music, dirty dancing, and contests all day where you can win stuff from us and our sponsors. Don’t forget to bring some cashish or plastic (yeah we take cards) if you wanna eat, drink and be merry with our vendors after the race.
WHAT DO I DO WITH MY OLD SHOES?
Let’s be frank: your shoes are going to be a muddy mess after the race and if you want to do some good rather than taking hours with a toothbrush to clean them off, don’t even bother cleaning them one bit cuz we will be accepting shoe donations. We will clean them, and give them to those in need.
HOW DO I SIGN THE WAIVER?
You MUST sign the waiver to participate and to ensure our legal records stay clean as a whistle, so please save a tree and sign the waiver online by logging in
HERE.
DO I HAVE TO PAY FOR PARKING?
C’mon. You think we’re going to nickel and dime you? Parking is FREE! We recently heard that there is a recession going on so how ‘bout you use that money on something more important like some tasty grub or a Dirty Dash hoodie? HOWEVER, we do encourage you to carpool since parking is limited and we care about the environment. We'll even some awards for those who pack in a carload of 5 or more people.
WHAT IF THE WEATHER IS BAD?
Seriously? How can the weather be bad? Shame on you; your glass is clearly half-empty. If it rains, even better, more mud! The Dirty Dash is as dependable as (and far less subsidized than) the US Postal Service and goes on rain or shine, global warming or global cooling. If it gets too hot, feel free to bask in the mud pit for longer and if it gets too cold, feel free to drop into the fetal position with your teammates and cuddle for warmth.
WHEN SHOULD I SHOW UP?
Arrive an hour or so before your start time to avoid traffic, relax, touch up your makeup, stretch out your hammies, and size up the competition.
IS THERE A KIDS’ RUN?
The Piglet Plunge will be the highlight of your child's summer, their storied running careers and potentially their existence to this point. They must be over age 2 and under age 12 to run in the kids' race and you’ve got to accompany them the whole way.
Registration is a measly $5. The Piglet Plunge will be about 1 mile and will include some of the best obstacles to ensure a thoroughly muddy child: the Slop n' Slide, the Hog Wash and the Pig Sty. All children must be respectful of other children, pushing or splashing will result in being removed from the kids' race area for the day and subject to grounding at their parents’ discretion. You’ll need to sign a waiver for them before they receive a sweet Dirty Dash Tattoo (temporary of course) to show that they can participate on race day. The Piglet Plunge will begin at 2:20 pm.
WHAT SHOULD I BRING?
Bring a towel, a change of clothes, a bag for your dirty clothes, old shoes, and your finest swan dive into the mud pit--oh and you may want to bring some cash for food or merchandise. We will have a way for you to clean off—they may be cold showers with hundreds of other Dirty Dashers but at least you won’t have to worry about your car on the drive home.
WHAT SHOULD I WEAR? / ARE THERE AWARDS?
Feel free to dress up as a superhero, cartoon character, Snooki, Flav’a Flav, a UPS deliveryman or anything else that would really accentuate the mud in your eyes. It is a family race though so make sure parents don’t have to shield their kids’ eyes at the mere sight of you. We’ll be walking around all day showering prizes on people we see Evolving into true Dirty Dashers—we’ll give out awards like:
The Dirty Dash Dirty 'Stache Award
The Dirty Dash Mud-Runway Award
The Dirty Dash Cleanest Name Award
The Dirty Dash Filthiest Family Award
CAN I TAKE PICTURES?
The Dirty Dash is sure to be one of the best photo opps of the year, but also one of the surest ways to lose your camera in the mud. To solve this dilemma we have enlisted a team of professional photographers (with expensive equipment and liberal insurance policies) to crawl into the trenches and do the dirty work for you.
Flo-Foto will have their photographers positioned throughout the sloppiest sections of the course in order to capture every individual and team in their dirtiest, sloppiest moments. The filthy photos will then be swiftly posted on the web (where else?) to view for free or purchase at unbelievably reasonable prices so you can plaster it all over your facebook page. Please put your race numbers on the FRONT if you want to be able to find your pictures.
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