If there are two things Gonzaga basketball has proven to Spokane and to the world, they are these:
1. In response to the age-old question, “Who loves short shorts?” there are only two legitimate answers: John Stockton and runners.
2. The mere mention of Adam Morrison evokes one disturbing image more than any other: a patchy, dirty ‘stache.
And what happens when you combine two of the greatest things the Inland Northwest has to offer? If you said 3-on-3 figure skating you’d be wrong--though that would explain a triple axel and triple salchow better than Scott Hamilton ever did.
Try this one on, all you math-letes:
(SHORT SHORTS + DIRTY ‘STACHE) ^ BEER CHUG + MUD = THE DIRTY DASH
If you need a TI-85 to figure out that equation, let us know. We scored in the triple digits on our SATs... collectively.
So Nair them, wax them, shave them or bare them in pasty white glory, but get ready to expose those legs to the earthy elements of The Dirty Dash Spokane. But this isn’t just a competition that can be won by any old Mexican Hairless, you’ll win more prizes for sporting the Dirtiest ‘Stache than the pastiest legs or fastest time. Not only could you take home an extra beer, a hoodie, or a good-game butt pat, it might be the only way you maintain any self-respect after wallowing in the mud with us.
So start growing your Fu Manchu, Handlebar, Franz Josef, Mutton Chops or Chin Puff today. Or combine them into one massive Fu-bar-Puff-Chop….sounds like a new form of mixed martial arts. WAAT-CHAAA!
Race Day Info Packets will be posted 2 weeks before the race with tons of info on parking, color partying, and how to clean the color out of your most sensitive areas.