Even though Steve Prefontaine technically didn’t hit puberty till 13 like the rest of us, legend has it he emerged from the womb with a little peach fuzz growing on his upper lip.
His ‘stache helped him pass for a legit 16 year old driver when he was 7, and it was thick enough to help him vote for JFK in the 1960 election at the age of 9.
If he’d been wise enough to run in The Dirty Dash to give his whiskers a thorough coating of mud, he could have been dropping Hamiltons on the craps table at the Three Rivers Casino when he was 12, received his PhD in Curly Locks at 17, and run for Pre-sident by 20. The one missing ingredient: MUD.
Don’t let your life get stuck on the slow boat cuz of your own dirt drought, filth famine, or slop shortage. You’ve got big pants to fill and you aren’t gonna fill ‘em wearing padded spandex tri shorts, swimming through crystal clear waters and road racing for 13 miles of pavement pounding agony. The only way you fulfill your dirty destiny is by belly-flopping into a mud pit and breast-stroking your way to a mud makeover courtesy of The Dirty Dash.
Unlike most races where you emerge a little leaner but with labored breathing and a lifeless look in your eye, you’ll finish our race 5 pounds heavier, 3 times homelier, and 20 times happier. You’ll be Tweeting about it so loud the Ducks will think it’s a mating call.
So make Pre proud. Throw pre-caution to the wind and pre-pare yourself cuz this is pre-cisely the ingredient your life is missing. This all pre-supposes that you pre-register but we'd hate to be pre-sumptuous.
Race Day Info Packets will be posted 2 weeks before the race with tons of info on parking, color partying, and how to clean the color out of your most sensitive areas.